i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize