...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
