that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
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