yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
