Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
