Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
