new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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