I wannas sexs uuuuu
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
