Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
