Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
