If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
