Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
It's official drugs can't kill me
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Randomize
