allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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