Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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