It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
