Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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