I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
He keeps bees of course he's weird
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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