I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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