Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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