i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Randomize
