It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
