i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
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