I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
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