I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
