Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I forgot how hot balto sounded
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
