So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
She bit a glass in half.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
