To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
