I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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