you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Randomize
