Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I think I died a long time ago.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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