let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Randomize
