dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
