Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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