i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
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