i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Mom said you looked used
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Dick very happy bro
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Randomize
