your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
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