when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
