is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize