Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize