You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
We need to get me chipped asap
Randomize
