I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
