those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
