i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
