Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
