I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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