He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Randomize
