im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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