I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
