Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize