I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
